The Drinker's Alphabet
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  • A is for Alcohol, The key to surviving college
  • B is for Beer, The most disgusting alcohol of all, but great for chugging
  • C is for Class, What you're supposed to get up and go to after a Thursday night party
  • D is for Dancing, A favourite pastime of almost every drunk, usually looks pathetic
  • E is for Emergency, The keg is empty or there is no one over 21 in your drinking party
  • F is for Fucked-Up, Signified by leaning over a toilet puking your guts out
  • G is for Games, Anything that involves cards, dice and chugging beers
  • H is for Hang-over, Reminds you of how great last night was and how much you drank
  • I is for Idiot, The guy that spilled his beer on you and everyone else at the party
  • J is for Jail, Where you'll end up after trying to use a fake ID or stagger home
  • K is for Kissing, What you'll do to anything that moves after 15 beers
  • L is for Lord, Person you beg to get you out of every situation involving alcohol
  • M is for Money, That which you no longer have due to too much partying
  • N is for Not Again!, What you scream when you wake up beside someone you don't know.
  • O is for Ouch!, When you sober up, you ache everywhere, as you were so drunk that you fell down the stairs somewhere, and are only now feeling the pain.
  • P is for Piss, What you have to do every five minutes while you're drinking beer
  • Q is for Quilt, What you puked on last night in bed and have to clean in the morning
  • R is for Reform, What you promise god you will do while you're puking in the toilet
  • S is for Sex, What you did with that person you met last night while you were drunk
  • T is for Ten, The number of beers it takes ME to get drunk U is for Under-Age, Most of the drinking population in college town
  • V is for Vodka, The mother of all alcohols and the best way to get drunk in an hour
  • W is for Worm, The part of Tequila that reminds you of Biology class tomorrow
  • X is for X-Ray, How they can see into your stomach before they pump it
  • Y is for Yourself, The one who drinks WAY TOO MUCH every week-end
  • Z is for Zoned, How you will be for the next 12 hours following drinking

Last modified: Saturday 24 July, 2004 @ 12:38:30:31 EST