How many Pentium designers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

1.99904274017, but that's close enough for non-technical people.

What do you get when you cross a Pentium PC with a research grant?

A mad scientist.

What's another name for the "Intel Inside" sticker they put on Pentiums?

The warning label.

What do you call a series of FDIV instructions on a Pentium?

Successive approximations.

Complete the following word analogy: Add is to Subtract as Multiply is to: 1) Divide 2) ROUND 3) RANDOM 4) On a Pentium, all of the above

What algorithm did Intel use in the Pentium's floating point divider?

"Life is like a box of chocolates." (Source: F. Gump of Intel)

Why didn't Intel call the Pentium the 586?

Because they added 486 and 100 on the first Pentium and got 585.999983605.

According to Intel, the Pentium conforms to the IEEE standards 754 and 854 for floating point arithmetic. If you fly in aircraft designed using a Pentium, what is the correct pronunciation of "IEEE"?

A: Aaaaaaaiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeee!

What is Intel's follow-on to the Pentium?

Repentium

What does the element Pentium decay into?

Inert silicon with the emission of a press release

Top Ten New Intel Slogans For the Pentium:

9.9999973251 It's a FLAW, Dammit, not a Bug

8.9999163362 It's Close Enough, We Say So

7.9999414610 Nearly 300 Correct Opcodes

6.9999831538 You Don't Need to Know What's Inside

5.9999835137 Redefining the PC - and Mathematics As Well

4.9999999021 We Fixed It, Really

3.9998245917 Division Considered Harmful

2.9991523619 Why Do You Think They Call It Floating Point?

1.9999103517 We're Looking for a Few Good Flaws

0.9999999998 The Errata Inside

The 0.00000000000001th new Intel slogan for the Pentium: "We give you the most megaflops"

Other bits:

The Pentium doesn't have bugs or produce errors; it's just Precision-Impaired.

Intel business executives have been so stressed by staying up late at night trying to figure out what to do about the Pentium Problem, that they're past the floating point.

I heard that Intel lost one of its divisions today ...

If you own a Pentium try this on a spreadsheet: ((4195835 / 3145727) x (3145727)) - 4195835. Since ((x/y)xy)-x)=zero, watch their surprise when it equals -256.

There is a bug in Intel's Pentium that causes it to give incorrect math results. Nothing like showing that a $2000 computer can't do math as well as $10 calculator or even a 8th grade algebra student with pen and paper.