Funny Stuff - Female Funnies - The Woman Song
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	I'm glad I'm a woman, yes I am, yes I am


	I don't live off of Budweiser, beer nuts and Spam


	


	I don't get wasted at parties and act like a clown


	And I know how to put the damned toilet seat down!


	


	I don't brag to my buddies about my erections


	I won't drive to Hell before I ask for directions


	


	I won't grab your hooters, I won't pinch your butt


	My belt buckle's not hidden beneath my beer gut


	


	And I don't go around "readjusting" my crotch


	Or yell like Tarzan when my bed gains a notch


	


	I don't belch in public, I don't scratch my behind


	I'm a woman you see - I'm just not that kind!


	


	I am glad I'm a woman, I'm so glad - I could sing


	I sure don't have body hair like shag carpeting


	


	It doesn't grow from my ears or cover my back


	When I lean over, you can't see 3 inches of crack


	


	And what's on my head doesn't leave with my comb


	I'll not buy a toupee to cover my dome


	


	Or have a few hairs pulled from over the side


	I'm a woman, you know --I've got far too much pride!


	


	And I honestly think its a privilege for me


	To have these two boobs and squat when I pee


	


	I don't live to play golf and shoot basketball


	I don't swagger and spit like a Neanderthal


	


	I won't tell you my wife just does not understand


	Stick my hand in my pocket to hide that gold band


	


	Or tell you a story to make you sigh and weep


	Then screw you, roll over and fall sound asleep!


	


	Yes, I'm glad I'm a woman, a woman you see


	Can forget all about that old penis envy


	


	I don't long for male bonding, I don't cruise for chicks


	Join the Hair Club For Men, or think with my dick


	


	I'm a woman by chance and I'm thankful it's true


	I'm so glad I'm a woman and not a man like you!


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Last Modified
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Sunday 26 October, 2003 @ 19:46:11:921 EST


Metadata
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DC.Title: Funny Stuff - Female Funnies - The Woman Song
DC.Creator: Starweb Document Generator V2.6
DC.Subject: Humour
DC.Description: A collection of humour pages collected and submitted from the internet.
DC.Publisher: Lukas Tan
DC.Contributor:
DC.Date: 2003-10-26
DC.Type: Female Funnies
DC.Format: text/html
DC.Identifier: C:\Documents and Settings\Lukas\My Documents\Homepage\Humour\Female\Womens-Song.txt
DC.Source: Womens-Song.swx
DC.Language: en
DC.Relation: txt.swt
DC.Coverage: Global
DC.Rights: Under Australian law, copyright of this document falls with it's publisher (Lukas Tan). However, all humour content is considered to have open copyright.