Funny Stuff - Jargon Funnies - Sales Jargon
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Sales and packaging jargon.

+ NEW: Different colors from the previous version
+ Loaded with new features: We decided to forgo beta testing on this puppy
+ Includes an API for developers: It's there, but you have to figure out how to write a library to get to it
+ Graphical User Interface: It'll scramble your display
+ Improved Documentation: This time we told you how to install it
+ Unlimited license: We don't give you ANY rights to it at all!
+ Free updates: We're done with it - no more revisions!
+ 800 number tech support: Which will be disconnected tomorrow
+ $50 rebate offer: $50.00 when you demand a refund because it doesn't actually work
+ Industry Leader: No one else had the guts to sell it at this price, but we know you'll be suckered
+ Written with OOP in mind: That's what our programmers said, "oops!"
+ Over 30,000 copies in use: We only sold 3, but we figure that many have been passed around
+ In use over 5 years: It took us that long to get it working
+ Rated "best buy" by __________: We pay a lot of money for expensive ads
+ Fourth generation product: The first three were "stillborn"
+ We listen to our users: We just don't do anything they request
+ $495 list, no only $395: We just raised the price from $95
+ Rated #1 by industry: My cousin Ernie drives a trash truck, and he likes it better than anything else
+ Works with most video types: Just not yours
+ Convenient On-Line support: We've found it very convenient to ignore messages there!
+ 24-hour hotline: And boy, do they get hot when they discover we're absent 24 hours a day!


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Last Modified
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Sunday 26 October, 2003 @ 19:46:12:203 EST


Metadata
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DC.Title: Funny Stuff - Jargon Funnies - Sales Jargon
DC.Creator: Starweb Document Generator V2.6
DC.Subject: Humour
DC.Description: A collection of humour pages collected and submitted from the internet.
DC.Publisher: Lukas Tan
DC.Contributor:
DC.Date: 2003-10-26
DC.Type: Jargon Funnies
DC.Format: text/html
DC.Identifier: C:\Documents and Settings\Lukas\My Documents\Homepage\Humour\Jargon\Sales-Jargon.txt
DC.Source: Sales-Jargon.swx
DC.Language: en
DC.Relation: txt.swt
DC.Coverage: Global
DC.Rights: Under Australian law, copyright of this document falls with it's publisher (Lukas Tan). However, all humour content is considered to have open copyright.